family values such as consecrating sex for marriage.
Virgins are scorned and ostracized.
by Maureen Johnston
During my high school years in 1981-82, I became close friends with an exchange student, a girl from Sweden in my small farm midwest hometown. We were 17 years old.
At that time, in my high school, most of the girls were virgins and any girl that was discovered to have had sex was shunned, ostracized, and called a “slut”
And the boys treated non-virgins girls badly too, lots of name-calling and disapproval
So after this Swedish girl and I became close friends she confided in me that she had had sex already at 16. It was surprising because she was so sweet and innocent looking with her fair skin, natural blond hair, and blue eyes. I was shocked that she had had sex –because we thought girls, who had sex were bad girls who also smoked pot, drank, got in trouble, and did badly in school. But she was none of that. She was sweet, very smart, kind, gentle, and shy and very feminine and pretty at 17 years old.
Then she told me HOW she lost her virginity. She said that in Sweden being a Virgin is the total opposite understanding –it’s a BAD thing. In Sweden, having sex is considered very important and healthy for a teenager’s overall health and well being. Thus Swedish parents encourage their daughters to have sex as soon as possible and get rid of this nasty virginal condition. What?
I was so shocked as she told me this. Then she said her parents had a summer house in the north of Sweden and they pressured her to get a boyfriend, which she did, at about 15 or 16, and then the parents took their 16-year-old daughter and her 16-year-old boyfriend up to their summer house, dropped them off to be alone there and told them not to come back until they had had sex. The teenagers were left at the house for the summer to fornicate.
I said weren’t you worried about getting pregnant –No my parents had already taken me to a doctor and gotten me on the pill!
Wow! I was so dumbfounded –I just could not believe it. There was absolutely no concept that virginity was special (created oxytocin bonding) and that there was a privilege and responsibility to a man for the right to have sex with a woman that he would be able to care for her (emotionally, financially) and a child that could potentially come out of that union and would be part of an established stable family unit. None of that. Sex and procreation were stripped apart and it was just considered a healthy exercise to do like jogging.
Then another thing happened, during high school with this Swedish girl. We went swimming at the lake one summer midwest day. Afterward –she just took off her wet swimming suit and was about to lay on the towel naked. Her hosting mother quickly grabbed a towel and throw it around her and said, “No No we don’t go naked in America like that -we use changing rooms.” –I was stunned and amazed that she had absolutely no shame or sense of modesty about exposing her naked body right there where lots of other people were around enjoying the lake.
The Swedish girl told me that most Swedes go naked at public saunas and their various public beaches. She said around age 11 or 12 she had some shyness or felt a little uncomfortable as she was developing breasts –but she was forced to sit naked with her family and neighbors in these public saunas and became disconnected from a personal sense of privacy about exposing her naked body to any person.
I wondered what happened to a generation of Christian Swedish people, their morals, to break down and completely flip the script like that?
In college, around 1985, I met a male Swedish Harvard law student, who mocked the American women and culture that supported virginity until they were either married or in love in a serious relationship This Swede acted like it was such a crazy weird thing that young college American women “protected” their virginity. He incredulously asked me, “Why are you Americans doing that?”
WHY SAVING SEX FOR MARRIAGE IS IMPORTANT
I did not know why we wanted to stay virgins, aside from the Bible teaching that, but I had an intuition that it was important. Then later I learned about Oxytocin Bonding and how the mortality rate of women goes down with each lover. And how super unhealthy it is for women to have multiple sex partners on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level (Now I know Why: I actually teach a pre-teen/teen self-esteem chastity class on the subject.)
A woman’s body literally changes its various DNA factors to match up/harmonize with her male partner to prepare her body to accommodate the DNA of her partner for a future baby. Generally, a woman who is a blood type A cannot share blood and organs with a blood type O, unless he has been her sex partner for a period of time, usually about 6 months for her body to adapt and switch over to harmonize with his blood genome and various DNA factors. None of this happens to men during sex, they stay the same. It the woman whose body is forced by nature to change and adapt for childbirth and also to her peril. So when the Bible says that a man and woman become one in marriage –meaning sexual intercourse – it is literally the woman’s body that moves over to become one with the man’s. (Ephesians 5:31; Mark 10:8)
So a woman’s body goes through PROFOUND changes from sex with a male and to have a woman change partner like its nothing, ignores that her body literally goes through somersaults with each new male sex partner that causes various health problems and a shortened life span. Too many male sex partners make women crazy. Then men complain that women are unhinged –but society/culture allows men to think nothing of having sex with various partners over their lifetime with no responsibility to any woman.
Women are pawns in the free-sex culture. An easy sex society eventually collapses.
What a great article by Maureen Johnston! Fidelity, commitment, and bonding are the keystones to happiness with that ONE special person to whom you get married and then spend a lifetime together with; having fun and never tire of each other’s company and missing that person terribly whenever you’re apart. Exclusivity and possession are the bedrock upon which a lifetime marriage is built. Without it, you’re just a tumbleweed blowing in the wind.
And how gratifying to read Maureen’s concluding segment in which she addresses the most important issue for young women to learn & hold fast to: saving sex for marriage IS important.
Sex is both a spiritual and physical intermingling – on a soul level – with the other party. It’s not a minor event. It’s the most intimate, private, precious, and sacred thing you can possibly do with another human being. You don’t throw it around like confetti to every Joe Blow you meet on the weekend and not expect negative repercussions in its wake. Good men of good heart, do NOT WANT to marry a woman who’s been sleeping with dozens, let alone hundreds of guys. A few guys before you? OK, you can accept that. But dozens and dozens? No (unless you’re an idiot and looking forward to a short, unhappy marriage).
The traditional view and moral framework for mating and marriage is STILL the wisest course to follow and will bring the greatest happiness and rewards for you, your family, and your children’s kids – and their kids.
The First Comment (below) and all the posted comments were great to read; especially that powerhouse of Experience, Wisdom, and Critical Discernment, Tony Blizzard.
Friend of Sweden-
About the divorce rate, its said that about 50% end with divorce in Sweden. The big thing is that people here don’t get married anymore and just cohabit so that affects the statistics because cohabitation has a higher rate of separation than marriage. Plus all the migrants are young and many of them tend to marry more than Swedes do.
Then we have another amazing figure. Almost 10% of all Swedish marriages are between an ethnic Swede and a Thai woman…..:). If we include women from other Asian countries the number will rise even further. As mentioned before, Swedish women are generally so unattractive that its almost impossible to find a good, traditional one. At least 80-90% go for modern culture with their black witch dresses.
Her article is partly true but I wouldn´t say that this kind of parent was average in the 1980s, Swedish parents usually didn´t mix into their kids sexual life which was very negative. There was an atmosphere of free sex already from age 14 in my home village (the mid to late 80s) and girls boasted of having boyfriends from ages 13-14. Girls slept with boys from that age. Not everyone but the “popular” ones. And Christians were scorned as stupid – it was self-hatred actually – a Jewish thing in Sweden to hate our own culture and then finally suicide by importing foreign cultures and people en masse. This is true. And the girls sometimes broke up and had different boyfriends until age 16-17 maybe. Then they settled down and had babies at age 18-22.
However, a girl in my class got together with a boy when she was 11 and they are still married today.
It was as if Swedish people had gone mad at the time (still today) and people were not able to think rationally while in groups (group psychology is super strong). I think Sweden actually is the root of western evil and most of them are demon-possessed but the curse is rapidly losing its power over the good people and they wake up and especially many Swedish men have realized the truth about Swedish women. There are 70-year-old cultural Marxists who use Afghan boys for sex. It´s as if they have lost their human nature and turned into animals.
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